Thursday, February 23, 2012

I didn't realize that.

So, today I was talking a good friend of mine, who is going through her own infertility process. She has been blessed with a beautiful little boy. But, like more woman in our situation. When you know the pain of infertility, having a baby in your arms never changes the fact that you know additional children may be a challange.

As I was attempting to comfort her, I started to think about our journey through this whole process. The things that I have learned and experienced, and of course the heart break that followed every time.

But since we started this journey almost 3 years ago, things have changed. I went through somethings that I never have could have imagined. I witnessed things that should never have occuried. This changed how I saw the world, and how I chose to deal with my inferility.. I knew I had felt this way, but it wasn't till today when I typed these words on the screen of my computer, that I finally realized that I am okay with my infertility.

"There is a reason you cannot have children. The Lord has other plans. But if your heart is open, the children that are meant to be in your family will come to you. Everyones journey has a reason, and sometimes the journey your children take to get to you may not always be the one you had planned. But, regardless they are yours and love you just as much. An eternal family is made up of people who love each other, not if they are biologically related"

A huge impact has been made on me. I embrace my infertility, and take pity on it.. I count every blessing that adoption brings into my life, and I know that there are more children who are waiting to come to our family. I know that the power of the priesthood, and through temple sealings, we are an eternal family. I am so very blessed to know this.

Everyone has a different journey, and story that is waiting to be written. Coming to terms with your trials is something that must be done in your own time. Don't force it, and beautiful things will happen when you can be healed.

I don't usually do this, and for those of you who want you're welcome to skip this part-

But, I want to bare my testimony, I believe in the Lords plan, and although sometimes I am weak, and I get frustrated with the things in my life that I feel are unfair.. I have the understanding in my heart that the Lord gave me this trial for a reason. I am capable of loving any child. This I know. I also know that the Lord always keeps his promises, we must be patient enough to receive them. I am so grateful for my family, regardless of how it's made.

We may be imperfect, our family may be patched together, and have different people and faces. But we are beautiful, and we love each other.

I hope the things in your life that you feel are missing, you can find peace for the reason. Or lack of reason.



I am so thankful for the knowledge we have. You are so loved. Izzy is lucky to have you as a mommy. I know you will be blessed with more children. Our Heavenly Father knows what we need and when we need it. I know we might have trials to get there but it is always worth it in the end.
I love you and think of you often.
Love you, Bobbi mom